There have been articles from a number of media organisations recently attempting to list the most influential TV shows of all time. I can’t be bothered to look them up or link to them because, as we all know from people on Twitter, old media is dead.

But, in the olden days of blogging – and this dear, neglected blog of mine is nine years old this month – we liked to join in a conversation by writing our own posts and linking to someone else’s. So, since Laurie has compiled his top 10 most influential TV shows in the new media world of teh internets, I’m happy to link to and discuss it – and then, of course, put my money where my mouth is with my own stream of consciousness list.

The first question to consider, though, is what we really mean by “influential”? Are we talking television that changed the world? Does that mean we’re morally obliged to dig up Cathy Come Home – and lull comatose into our kitchen sinks? Is affecting the words people use in everyday life as significant as heralding shifts in public policy? (Probably not.) Or do we mean TV that influenced TV itself and shaped what subsequently reached our screens? I’m going to assume we mean influence on both the world and on television, although as a fan of good TV, my list will lean towards the latter. And, while good TV can certainly influence the mood of the audience, I’m going to assume that we don’t just mean “Was it good telly?”

These lists are subjective but I nevertheless take issue with a fair few entries in Laurie’s. The Office? Sure. Only Fools and Horses? Nah. Very successful in its own right and yes, it popularised certain words and phrases, but its lasting influence is minimal. I’m not sure what the case is for The Avengers either – a classic show but what’s the major influence? A string of half-baked and now largely forgotten ITC knock-offs? And I don’t agree either with Tenko, Blackadder or Secret Army. While the latter had the crucial effect of leading directly to ‘Allo Allo!, that doesn’t seem a strong enough reason to put it in a shortlist of the most influential shows.

Off the top of my head, then, here are my ten. Where I’ll also differ from Laurie in compiling my list is that I’m happy to include shows I haven’t seen or don’t like because it’s not a list of shows I’ve seen or like but about impact. I’m also going to cast the net wider than the UK – although measuring influence largely with respect to the UK – and beyond just drama. Like Laurie, I’ve differed from the lists that sparked this off as I haven’t limited myself to one pick per year but instead plumped for ten notable programmes.

These all probably have a good case for inclusion but bubbling outside my top 10 are shows like Newsnight, Blue Peter, Big Brother, World in Action, Brass Eye, Sesame Street, Spitting Image, EastEnders, Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?, Murder One, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Yes, (Prime) Minister, Brookside and Twin Peaks. I was tempted to include “the news” but have stuck to specific programmes.

My top ten most influential TV shows

Doctor Who

I was tempted to leave it out because as a fanboy I’m biased, but Doctor Who has at least three strong reasons in its favour. First, it’s drilled its way deep into the national consciousness. Getting into a large lift only today, one of my fellow passengers commented, “It’s like the TARDIS.” Secondly, its current, post-2005 incarnation revitalised Saturday night drama and telefantasy as suitable for British prime-time – without Doctor Who there would be no Merlin, no Primeval, no Demons, no Bonekickers… Maybe I should stop there. And thirdly, the show has played a big role in inspiring writers, directors, composers and other creative people to pursue their vocations.

Top of the Pops

Gone but enjoying a walking death on BBC Four, Top of the Pops was the definitive weekly music show. I always preferred ITV’s The Chart Show personally but there’s no doubting Top of the Pops’ influence on the charts and the number of live (or live-ish) performances by major artists captured in its aspic.

Coronation Street

I’d conservatively estimate that I have seen fewer than ten episodes of Coronation Street but I’m still happy to include it as the grandmother of all UK soap operas. While EastEnders might have gone for the more hard-hitting storylines and tackled issues that challenged public perceptions, EastEnders itself owes a lot to Corrie, which had laid the ground work of the evening community soap opera for more than 20 years before the BBC’s young upstart exploded onto the scene.

The Office

The mockumentary style had been tried before – People Like Us springs to mind – as had the comedy of awkwardness – look no further than Fawlty Towers – but The Office jumped up and down on the corpse of studio sitcom (now, thankfully, resuscitated by shows like Not Going Out and Miranda) and influenced the style and approach of many of the shows that followed in both the UK and US.

That Was the Week That Was

I’m not going to pretend to have watched much of it but TW3‘s legacy is widely recognised. It chipped away at the political establishment that had previously been treated with reverence and genuflection. It paved the way for other satirical shows, including Spitting Image and Brass Eye – both mentioned above as candidates for the list – and with its transition to American TV, there’s an argument that its influence even stretches to The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and The Colbert Report. It attacked apartheid, helped to bring down Profumo in 1963 and attracted complaints from the people it lampooned – always a good sign. It also boosted the careers of Frankie Howerd, John Cleese and Graham Chapman, Willie Rushton and Peter Cook, as well as making David Frost a household name. Frost’s profile led to both The Frost Report – which thrust Cleese and the Two Ronnies onto Britain’s TV screens – and, perhaps most importantly, Through the Keyhole.

Fawlty Towers

While I’m trying not to treat quality as a major factor, the sheer brilliance of Fawlty Towers in both scripting and execution means that it remains the yardstick by which other sitcoms will measure their success (a hiding to nothing really). That so many writers and producers respect it and would give their right arm to emulate it is a sign of its influence nearly 40 years (blimey) since the first episode was broadcast.

The Simpsons

A noble spirit embiggens the smallest show – and The Simpsons is certainly not small. While early cartoons like The Flintstones pushed animation into the realms of sitcom, it was Matt Groening’s creation that showed that animation wasn’t just for kids, and with huge success. King of the Hill, American Dad, Family Guy, Archer – once The Simpsons had broken through the celluloid ceiling, a new genre was born. It affected sitcom more widely, popularising visual gags and an approach focused on maximising the laugh rate. And as for the show itself, its influence on American life can be seen in the words of George H.W. Bush in 1992: “We’re going to keep trying to strengthen the American family. To make them more like the Waltons and less like the Simpsons.” And no, I’m not including The Waltons in this list.

The Killing

It’s hard to predict its long term influence and it’s not as if there weren’t already bleak crime shows from Scandinavia (Wallander) or elsewhere (Spiral), but The Killing caught the imagination enough to coalesce around itself a whole genre of Nordic Noir. That opened the gates for series like Borgen and The Bridge to break through outside Scandinavia, and it also influenced the style of new dramas in the UK and US – most recently ITV’s murder mystery serial Broadchurch.

Popstars

Two shows that dominate the schedules and the public consciousness now are Britain’s Got Talent and The X-Factor. But before them came Pop Idol (and its chum across the Atlantic American Idol), and before those came the show that launched Hear’Say, Pop Stars. These series launched the careers of Girls Aloud, Will Young, Leona Lewis, Olly Murs and many more, including assorted Eurovision entrants and everyone’s favourite boy band, One True Voice. But they also reinforced a cultural shift towards the desirability of celebrity and “being famous” as an unachievable aspiration for thousands of young people. Prime-time talent shows have spread like the plague and Popstars was Typhoid Mary.

Friends

This one has sneaked in as I was disinclined to put another sitcom on the list but, on reflection, I think Friends justifies its inclusion. Its longevity and endless repetition has made it one of the best known sitcoms of the last twenty years. Like The Simpsons, it encouraged the genre to push for a high laugh rate, but – in common with many of its American predecessors – its characters and their relationships were a key part of the story, with Ross and Rachel possibly the ultimate will-they-won’t-they TV couple. It inspired a haircut, spawned a spin-off and did for studio comedy what The Office did for single camera.

So there you go. Ten shows, off the top of my head. Anything major I’ve missed? Or anything you think doesn’t deserve its place?

It’s today! It’s the final! I have booze, I have Euro snacks, and I have time for some snark before it all kicks off.

We’ve come this far together. One more night. Let’s see at who’s made it through the rigours of the two semi-finals (I mean the acts, not you and I) and look at the line-up for tonight’s Euromusic spectacular. No pussyfooting about – this is Truth.

1. United Kingdom – As Arnold Dorsey (call him by his name) himself points out, Love Can Set You Free is a grower. Unfortunately, most of the voting public will see it just once, plus a few recaps. I’m still no fan of the key change in this but on a night with a shocking shortage of key changes, it’s more than welcome. I’ve no doubt Arnold (call him by his name) will belt it out of the arena, in one of the most understated productions of the night, but will that be enough for us to see the contest coming the UK next year? No, no it won’t.
2. Hungary‘s song Sound of Our Hearts is one of my favourites and I was most pleased to see it get through to the final. While Tuesday’s live performance didn’t quite bring the power of the recorded version, this is still a nice catchy number from the oh-so-wittily named Compact Disco.
3. Rona Nishliu from Albania has quite the pair of lungs on her. That epic shrieking was very much present in the semi-final and clearly impressed the voters. If you have ear defenders, I’d put them on before she gets going..
4. Speaking of health and safety, I hope there’s been a proper risk assessment of wearing a blindfold on stage. Lithuania – Donny Montell is a tricksy little man. “Look at my power ballad” he says, tempting you in, and then BOOM he’s swiping you with his up tempo song about the blindness of love. This was one of the two I voted for in the second semi-final Watch out for some seriously sub-Fizz attire removal.
5. Bosnia and Herzegovina rightly made it through the final but there’s not much memorable about this perfectly creditable piano number to suggest it will win through. MayaSar is one of several female acts competing in the parallel game of Who’s Got Servalan‘s Best Outfit?
6. It’s no surprise that Russia made it to the final with their heady mix of crap singing and crap dancing. At least the grannies appear to be having fun, but bear in mind that they want to lure you to their gingerbread house and then bake you in their oven. You don’t want that, do you? No, of course you don’t. (On a side note: when I suggested on Twitter on Tuesday that homophobic Russia may not be an ideal host country for the next Eurovision, someone replied that they didn’t think Russia was homophobic. This from Human Rights Watch is just one quickly Googled reason to disagree with them.)
7. I’m not ashamed to admit that I love Iceland‘s atmospheric duet, with its dramatic lyrics and vibrant fiddling. Sadly, the foreboding silence in the middle of the song that’s in the video didn’t make it to the (tough) live realisation, but it is another song to feature one of tonight’s rare key changes, so cherish it.
8. Cyprus‘s own Catherine Zeta Jones has gone up in my estimation thanks to her performance on what looked like a dry stone wall in the first semi-final and I was pleased to see this get through. It’s pretty standard Eurodance but catchy and fun and I wouldn’t be surprised if it does well.
9. Whistle and I’ll come to you, my France. The song is strong, original and interesting. The performance is very much targeted at the gays. The danger for Anggun is that eyes are on the topless gymnasts when ears should be on her singing. Well, that’s one danger. The other is that she gets concussion. You’ll see why.
10. France is immediately followed by another of the Big Five nations, the recently returned Italy. Nina Zilli has picked a style that will stand out from the crowd, although I’m still finding the transition from verse to chorus jarring. I hope this does well, as it’s been tipped, not least because I’ve drawn it to win in the office Eurovision sweepstake.
11. Estonia was the other country I voted for in the second semi. It’s a nice little ballad, with no snazzy production of gimmicks, carried by a strong performance from Ott Lepland. That said, I’d be surprised if it finishes very high and you may be happy never to hear the word “Kuula” again by the end.
12. I can picture the discussion at Norway Eurovision Towers (every country has a Eurovision Towers): “That guy from Sweden was good last year.” “Eric Saade.” “Yeah. Do you think he’d enter for us this year?” “I doubt it.” “Oh, why not?” “Well, for one thing he’s Swedish.” “OK, then. Launch a national Eric Saade lookalike contest, give the winner Eric Saade’s clothes and make the him represent us at Eurovision singing a not-quite-as-good-as-2011’s-Popular pop number. Do you think you can do that?” “Actually, I think I know just the man…” This track sounds like something Madonna rejected a decade ago. It’s fine, although I’m still not a fan of the rasping synths and I’d happily exchange it for a Popular or a Manboy.
13. Azerbaijan were last year’s winners and so automatically qualify for this year’s final. I’m not sure When the Music Dies would be hear otherwise. Look out for the old man sitting on the glass coffee table. I kid you not.
14. Romania present three minutes of unremarkable jollity. The bagpipe player appears to be a scientist from The War Games.
15. I was surprised Denmark‘s tiresome entry made it to the final. This is just a middle of the road as it was on Tuesday, except this time I’ve already sat through it once. It’s called Should’ve Known Better and yes, Tuesday’s voters, you should’ve. On the plus side, one of her backing singers has a lovely armchair.
16. Good news if Denmark left you slumping in your own armchair – it’s Greece! This is Eurovision by the book and is all the better for it. Catchy, upbeat and fun. I wonder if any wags on Twitter will manage to come up with a joke about the Greek debt crisis when this is on? Maybe a suggestion that Greece couldn’t afford to host the contest next year? I doubt anyone’s thought of that yet so it’ll be pretty funny.
17. Won’t somebody rid me of this euphoric Swede? The Eurovision fans have apparently been in quite the priapic state about this for months and I genuinely don’t know why. Is it because she has frizzy hair? Is it because this is the most generic “euphoria” track ever recorded and also called Euphoric? Bring back Eric Saade (see above). I shan’t eat my words if this wins, because I’ll still be baffled, but I don’t believe it will win so ner. Britain, DO NOT VOTE FOR THIS.
18. I expect the next song to produce a fairly poor result for Turkey, although it will pick up some votes from fans of capes and stereotypically gay leather caps. It fills three minutes but the only thing memorable about it is a particularly create piece of nautical choreography.
19. Spain is another Big Five country with a bye to the final. It’s pretty good, although it might stand a better chance if Spain would accept the hegemony of the English language rather than stubbornly entering song after song in whatever their national language is. Extra points will be available for potentially the best key change of the night.
20. Our final Big Five entry is from Germany, whose track is the one that would sound most at home in the British charts. This isn’t surprising when you learn that Jamie Cullum is now working against the UK, having written this ditty for singer Roman Lob. It’s one of the last ballads in the contest, which may stand it in good stead, and Not Being Very Eurovision did no harm at all to 2010’s German winner Lena.
21. Malta – This is the Night reminds me of Sakis Rouvas’s Greek entry This is Our Night from 2009, which isn’t a big problem. Malta have a habit of entering tedious ballads so this marks a pleasant change of tack, although you may, like me, feel like slapping everyone on the stage and shouting into their stupid faces that there is no Hoxton in Malta.
22. FYR Macedonia – This faux ballad kicks into gear just in time, turning into a nicely rocky number with some electric guitar and strings to drive it home. With all of the big guitar bands knocked out, this may fill a niche.
23. 1980s training montage! It’s Ireland and yes, it’s Jedward. For some reason, despite them representing a country that is not the UK (their own choice), the BBC presenters keep encouraging us to get behind Jedward. I might get behind them if they were standing on some kind of high ledge, but otherwise, no thanks. This song could do well if they manage a reasonable live performance – and they have quite the outfits and staging, not to mention the backing singers, to distract from their singing.
24. Serbia‘s misfortune at being early in their semi-final is offset but healthy late position in the final. This is another ballad that takes a while to get going – many of its brethren having been cast aside in the qualifying round – but it could do all right if the voters are in the mood. I doubt I shall care much by this point.
25. Ukraine – This one’s not for me. It’s upbeat enough but I don’t like the syncopated synths and fake strings. It’s also mostly the same three words over and over again.
26. It’s the last song! And thankfully Moldova have a good one. It’s cheerful, fun, has a nice ska jazz thing, a good instrumental bit and is all about how he’s going to a woo a lady with his trumpet. Also, the singer looks like he could do a bit of DIY if you needed it. The only points off are for a teasing almost-but-not-a-key-change moment (plus Moldova’s another country with issues.)

To assist in any scoring you wish to do, I have prepared a Eurovision 2012 scoresheet. You may find this useful if you wish to shun such nonsense categories as “Costume” or “Choreography” and focus on what the content is really about.

And that’s that. See you at 8pm on BBC One. In the immortal words of Delia Smith: “Let’s be ‘avin’ you! Come on!”

Update: So congratulations to Sweden for winning. I’m still bemused but it’s a nice, progressive country and one that takes its Eurovisioning seriously. I’d happily spend a bit of May there next year given half a chance. At least it wasn’t the Russian grannies. And very bad luck to Arnold, who came undeservedly second from last but did a great job on the night.

Six lucky (or, in five cases, rich) countries get to jump straight to the Eurovision final. The winner of the 2011 contest and therefore host country for this year, Azerbaijan, automatically qualifies, as do the Big Five nations who significantly bankroll Eurovision. Money talks and, in this case, sings. Fortunately for the UK, we’re one of them.

So how do the six songs that have taken these coveted places stand up? Let’s take a look, as we go throoooooough the keyhole.

• United Kingdom – Appealing guitar and smooth strings underscores the human anagram’s waltzing ballad. Engelbert Humperdinck is an old pro who’ll give a strong performance on the night of what is definitely one of the contest’s more memorable slow numbers. I’m not sure the key change or the overblown finale suit the song but this is a perfectly respectable contribution to the UK’s Eurovision canon.
• France‘s best entry since Sébastien Tellier failed to get the recognition he deserved back in 2008. Catchy, original and with a lovely line in whistling. Not that should affect the performance of the song, of course, but I can see the video going down very well with *cough* the average Eurovision fan.
• Italy – I’ll happily take a bit of sax but this Amy Winehouse resurrection feels less than the sum of its parts. Nevertheless, it stands out from the crowd and has a certain funkiness to it. I do wish they’d choose a language and stick to it though…
• Azerbaijan‘s entry is, I’d suggest, actually better than last year’s winner – but then I had barely noticed last year’s winner and was somewhat taken aback when it did so well. This is another one for the fairly large pile marked Serviceable Ballads.
• Spain – It has a strong tune at its heart but it’s nothing special and there’s rather too much screeching towards the end for my liking.
• A very strong song from Germany, who have chosen a modern power ballad that could do very well. (Singer Roman Lob did once try to represent the contry in Eurovision before, but sadly When the Boys Come didn’t make it to the national final.)

That’s two high quality semi-finals and a good group of songs already in the final. From these six, my vote would probably go to France or Germany – given, of course, that I can’t vote for the UK 🙂

Once the semi-finals are over, we’ll know the 20 songs these six are up against along with the final running order. The first semi-final is next Tuesday, May 22nd, and will be broadcast live on BBC Three. Bring it on.

The first Eurovision 2012 semi-final didn’t look too bad for quality, and neither, I’m pleased to report, does the second. There are none of the stonkingly weird tracks that can make Eurovision particularly entertaining, but there are plenty of good songs that deserve to get through the final on May 26th.

Once again, I’ve linked each country name to the song’s video on YouTube so that you can see for yourself what I’m blathering about, should you wish.

This is the semi-final we in the UK are able to vote in, so play close attention. Here are the good, the bad, the ugly and the rest from Semi-Final 2:

The Good

In alphabetical order, these are the ten songs I’d put through to the final:

• Belarus – Rock breaks into the second semi-final with fresh-faced emo motorcycle gang Litesound. (The title, We Are the Heroes, made me briefly confuse this with 2006’s Lithuanian horror, We Are the Winners.) I prefer this to Switzerland’s lone rock effort from the previous semi.
• Bosnia and Herzegovina – A pleasant enough piano ballad that builds gently. It’s position penultimate in the running order may mean it sticks the memory.
• Croatia – This is good but, like so many other songs this year, takes a little too long to come alive. When it does, though, it’s enough to elevate Nebo for promotion. The video offers a group of half naked men fighting over a double bass and the Croatian Andrea Corr, in case that boats your float.
• Estonia – I haven’t checked the translation but from my rough Estonian I think this is a song about a man’s love for his pet koala. It’s one of the stronger ballads and some female backing vocals to complement Ott Lepland’s lead plus a sneaky key change push this through for me.
• Lithuania – Part power ballad, part up tempo number, this has the final spot in the semi-final and I can see it happily – and deservedly – winging its way through to a place in the final.
• FYR Macedonia – There is definitely a theme emerging: gentle tracks with some nice musicality that switch up a gear part way through (much to my relief). This is very much in that category: I was sceptical at the beginning, encouraged only by a touch of violin, but then jumped up a level, passed Go and collected 200 Macedonian denars.
• Malta – Nice of Malta to enter an upbeat number rather than a dreary ballad, so points for that. This is the Night is like one of the better reality show singles: it’s catchy and entertaining but strangely empty and if you peeled away the layers, deep in its heart you’d find Simon Cowell rubbing himself all over with £50 notes. Warning: if you watch the video, you may break your computer monitor as the desire to punch most of the people in it becomes overwhelming.
• Norway – One can’t help but notice the similarities between this and 2011’s third placed Popular by Eric Saade from Sweden. This is nowhere near as good but it succeeds in – ahem – playing to the same market. It’s hard to dislike – more rasping synths aside – but it may find itself in competition with Lithuania.
• I went to Serbia for the first time in March and had a brief discussion there about Eurovision. The Serbians I spoke to enjoy the contest but were concerned that the break-up of Yugoslavia and the USSR into multiple entrants (just look how many I’ve already included) makes it much harder for a Western European country to win – a view I’m sure is shared on this side of the continent. Their entry this year doesn’t start too promisingly, with a strong intrumental offset by some tedious balladeering of the kind I can live without. Nevertheless, I can see this doing all right (if it’s not impacted by going first) and once it springs to life, it’s not bad at all. (Željko Joksimović came close to winning back in 2004 with Lane Moje.)
• Slovakia – The loud metal opening made me expect awfulness from this but it’s another OK rock track. This will be going up again Belarus for those votes and I can see the extra drama of this song helping Slovakia to win that match-up.

The Bad

I’m afraid I can only muster one bad song for this section, and I’ll confess here it’s not even properly terrible. The culprit is…

• Slovenia – They’ve found their way into this section because they commit the ultimate Eurovision sin: it doesn’t matter how tuneful or well performed your song is if it’s dull, dull, dull. You can use all key changes and comedy headwear you like – and the last 30 seconds almost redeem it – but it’s stil nul points from me.

The Ugly

Again, only one song managed to shoehorn its way into this category:

• Georgia‘s entry deserves to be much worse than it is. It’s several songs mixed into one with some curious decisions, not least in the production of the creepy video. It’s kind of fun despite that, but I’m not ruling out having nightmares about a scary man in a white suit.

The Rest

The rules of maths mean that we’re left with six songs that won’t do anyone any harm but don’t make my top tier:

• Bulgaria – The weakest of the Eurodance numbers, with deductions for being this year’s most cynical attempt to use lots of different languages in one song. It’s not awful but definitely a good moment to go and make that cup of tea.
• Netherlands – Oh, Beth Orton, where did it all go wrong? It’s hard to pick out anything that’s definitively wrong with this: it’s tuneful enough, it has a clear style of its own, and yet… I think perhaps it’s so inoffensive that it’s gone right round past infinity and come back as offensive, its twee lyrics giving even Brotherhood of Man a run for their money. I can’t say it’s bad but I’d happily never have to hear it again. (And yes, I restrained myself from commenting on singer/writer Joan’s interesting choice of outfit.)
• Come on, Portugal – let’s not do this. There were a few nice touches, but when the backing singers came on I was hoping it was a sign of impending excitement rather than a few oohs, aahs and uninteresting harmonies. Go away and do it again.
• Sweden – More tedious syncopated synth Eurodance. At least its title will help those compiling this years’ euphoria albums work out whether it qualifies for inclusion. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if it does OK – it’s unfathomably been tipped for huge success – but *mumbles something about ABBA*
• Turkey have had a mixed track record over the last decade with several songs hitting the top five, including 2003’s winner Everyway That I Can and 2009’s unforgettable Düm Tek Tek. I can’t see Love Me Back setting the EBU on fire with its bizarre lyrics and obsession with nautical metaphors but neither is it a shipwreck.
• Ukraine – After a promising intro, I turned against this. With its mainstream dance attitude, it could do well given the right audience, but those syncopated synths and artificial strings don’t appeal to me at all.

Another good line-up so tune in for the second semi-final on Thursday 24th and see who makes it though – and cast your vote. I’m leaning towards Lithuania, Slovakia or Belarus but we’ll see how they do on the night.

Next time: the Big Five bankrolling countries and last year’s winner Azerbaijan are guaranteed places in the final. We’ll take a look at the six songs the winners of the semi-finals will be facing on May 26th.